How to be Patient

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Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.Robert H. Schuller

Some days I love advice like this and other days I find myself wishing the microwave would cook my meal faster.  As if waiting 4 minutes for an organic burrito is a long time.  This time of year it seems exceptionally difficult to be patient when the whole world outside is teaching patience but it seems the rest of the world is moving faster and faster, time for some non bendy yoga tips on what you and I can do to make this time of year a little easier by being patient with ourselves and others.

Have patience be your goal for the entire day. Take a day and make a serious effort to take your time and think about everything you do. Live in the moment and be mindful of yourself and your surroundings. Think of your day as a movie where you can hit “pause” at any time. Take regular pauses and at the end of the day think over all the decisions you made.

Slow down. Sometimes we must rush, but we think we need to rush more than we actually do. If you are hitting pause a few times each day, you will likely notice when you are rushing for no reason. When this happens, just stop for a minute and practice some non bendy yoga by taking a few deep breaths.

Think before you speak. This means that you pause and consider what you’re going to say before you say it. If we blurt out the first thought that comes to mind without considering the consequences, we often find ourselves saying stupid or offensive things. Practice this for as long as you can.

I’d love to hear from you … Let me know how being patient works for you.
 

Be My Yoga Valentine?

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As we come upon another gift giving holiday a rather significant one for me (it also happens to be my wedding anniversary 16 years!) I started to ponder the idea of love and charity.  As Valentines Day approaches I see the stores become a sea of red white and pink, and listen to my offspring tease my partner about the pressure of having Valentines Day and our Wedding Anniversary on the 14th, and how is Dad going to show Mom that he loves her? Not vice versa so much, I am not getting pressured on what it is I am going to do for him or them for that matter, they know that Mom will kiss Dad, put up some red and white stuff around the house bake cupcakes and boom the holiday is over.  But my real question is what’s with giving stuff to show your love???  Why don’t we perhaps just be more charitable??? How about some Non Bendy Yoga Valentines?

Instead of giving your loved ones more stuff why don’t you..

Donate things you don’t need. Some of the easiest items to donate include clothes, books, utensils, shoes, and toys. Charities with thrift stores will sell these items to raise cash for their charity. Day cares, hospitals, and churches may also accept donated items. Donating older items you don’t need anymore is a great way to practice charity for those who have a tight budget. Recently on a Cold Day I gathered up some of the books that have been passed onto me, some of the extra mugs that were taking up space in the kitchen and a couple of boxes of tea and dropped them off at the local Women’s Shelter.  That felt like love.

Volunteer. Our time can be as valuable as money or donated items. As a volunteer, you are working to further to goals of whatever organization you choose. Often times, volunteers are needed for community projects and by helping, you are helping your community. Volunteers can also serve those in need more directly by working with children, in soup kitchens or in retirement homes. Serving warm soup in weather like this feels like love.

You can also be charitable in your everyday life. If you see someone who needs a hand, help them out. This may include giving someone a battery jump, helping someone move, or helping someone with directions. Or giving a hug or an ear if they are having a crappy day. These situations happen at random, but by keeping an eye out we can find instances where we can demonstrate charity.  That really feels like love.

Kids and grownups learn by example and by showing charity you set a great Non Bendy Yoga Example.

Happy Valentines Day XOXO

Danielle

www.balafonyoga.com

“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” C.S. Lewis

Single Mother and Son Praying

I don’t know about you but I  have found that I instinctively avoid things that humble me. Things that I know that I am not good at or will look silly doing.  I just really don’t want to do or try.

Like running, I’m top heavy (big chested) so I really don’t like running. Well that’s not true. I love watching people run, or anything run for that matter horses, dogs, bugs when they are running out of my sight, my cat, my kids (I know my kids are people, but they run around me a lot!!!) just don’t ask me to run… I am likely to fall on my face.I don’t like being humbled by my own body. Not a good thing for a Yoga Teacher, there is always room for growth.

Accepting my bodies limitations  is different from being actually humbled.  Like many things, humility can be taught one step at a time. Here are a some Non Bendy Yoga things that I try to do to become more adept at being humble.

-Admit when I mess up. No one likes to accept their own mistakes, but doing so builds character and sets a good example for others. I willingly try to admit to the little mistakes with minor consequences and most of the big ones too. Especially with my kids, when I say to them your right I did forget to sign the permission slip or another one of my many parenting faux-pas. They and I know that being a Yoga Mamma does not mean that Mamma is all Om or Namaste.  This I hope will help to prepare all of us for the big mess-ups, which do inevitably happen.

-Learn from those around me, there will always be people who are better than us in certain ways.  (Runners) Don’t envy or resent them, I try learn from them.

-Help others. The best way to become humble is by being humbled. By serving or teaching others, we send the message that their needs are more important than our own.

I suggest that if you wish to make lasting change, slowly add humble actions into your everyday life. The best way to make permanent change is to make humble behavior a habit.

www.balafonyoga.com

 

 

Officer I did Nothing!!!

Are you feeling guilty about stuff that is not yours to feel guilty about??

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This past weekend my son had a hockey tournament in another town.  As we were rushing out the door I got a heads up from one of the other  Hockey Moms who had spotted a speed trap and let me know about it.  Sure enough just where I would have pressed a little harder on the gas there it was.

Once I got to the rink I thanked the proactive parent and then immediately felt guilty for not passing the word along.  Another parent could really have benefited from me making a call.  They got a big speeding ticket and lost some points. Both things they can’t afford. But I did not call ( I actually did not have their number…well I did but  looking up that number and everyone else’s number and calling  would have made me late,) So they got a ticket for driving too fast and breaking the law and I felt lousy!!!

For some reason I felt that the speeding ticket that they got was my fault!!!

Have you ever found yourself caught up in the drama of others? Then wound up feeling resentful and drained from all the energy you needlessly used?

I decided it was time to practice some Non BendyYoga and take full responsibility for what I had done. Nothing!!! I had done nothing . Nothing wrong, nothing to feel ashamed about…Nothing!!! It was my job to disconnect from the burden that I had chosen to carry.  

Knowing what we are and are not responsible for in our lives creates a unique type of freedom. Here are some examples were you may be taking on a burden that’s not yours.

You are NOT responsible for colleagues who cause a toxic work environment.

You ARE responsible for coming up with a plan on how you are going to work in it, or find something new. 

You are NOT responsible for your sisters’ divorce or the demise of any relationship.

You ARE responsible for what you do in your own relationships.

You are NOT responsible for your child declining their higher education and as a result ruining their perceived future.

You ARE responsible for your own education and future.

You are NOT responsible for your brother going bankrupt.

You ARE responsible for your own financial situation.

You are NOT responsible for the happiness and joy of others.

You ARE responsible for creating your own happiness.   

Letting go removes many of the energetic and karmic responsibility we choose to carry for others. When we refrain from allowing others to step their place of responsibility and accountability we steal their opportunity for personal growth and spiritual, development.

With the world moving at such a fast pace, and other peoples life situations constantly surrounding us it’s easy to get pulled into the big and little burdens of others, while turning a blind eye on our own struggles.

Know when to stand up and be accountable.  Know to do nothing.

Do you take on the burdens of others?  If so are you able to let go?? Lets Talk…

Danielle Intuitive Life/Yoga Coach

 

“God helps those who help themselves.” Ben Franklin

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Balfon Yoga- Increase self esteem

Crouching on my bed on hands and knees, I cupped my head in clenched hands as I took a few long deep breaths, praying that the pounding in my head would stop.

I felt the softness of the bed, the warmth of my partners still warm spot the smell of toast coming from the kitchen. I listened to the bedlam that accompanies the morning rush as my children and partner get the day started.

Completely aware of the pain in my head but feeling the relief in each inhale and the pain ebb in each exhale, I continued to breathe absorbing all the sounds that when I awoke I could not bear to hear.   Hunched on my bed, I was getting better, I was doing yoga.

The migraine was leaving.

Earlier, that morning I had woken up with a premenstrual migraine.

An older version of me would have been rushing around the house frustrated and angry resentful of all that had to be done to get  the “gang” out the door on time.   Focusing only on the intensity of the pain. This was also my typical behaviour when things didn’t “go my way” in any situation.

This time however, rather than reacting to my pain I used my voice and communicated to my partner what it was that was wrong and what I needed from him.

This experience made me realize just how simple it is to express what it is that I need and why it is ok to ask for help,  a simple request changed me.  In that moment when I asked for help, I was “doing yoga”.

There’s a misconception that yoga is about being bendy and learning how to relax.  Yoga is much more than that, yoga teaches us to be kind and gentle to ourselves.  To bring our attention to our breath and reflect before we act and to ask for help when we are in a  perceived or real negative situation.

Yoga is about asking for help, taking help when it is offered and turning off preconceived notions.

Tomorrow I get up with the gang, and my Sweet Babu can linger…

Can you do it?  Will you ask  for help even when you think you should not because it seems its not the right time??  That the schedule or others are more important? Or can you practice “Yoga”?

 

New Year Same You

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Balfon Yoga- Increase self esteem

In our hearts we know the best thing to do, but fail to do it. New Year’s resolutions are great examples of this.

We make resolutions because we know it would be better for us to lose weight, or get fit, or spend more time with those that matter most to us. The problem is that a resolution is generally easier to break than it is to keep.

This year let’s try something new.   We are going to cast aside the idea that we need improvement, this year we will accept who we are and understand that by doing so we are empowering ourselves to take the path that is best suited for us.

Let’s embrace the idea of self love, and by doing this we will only feed our body and mind with the best. Lets make these our resolutions…
• I will love, laugh and hug everyone more often, even if others think I am crazy.
• I will give up limiting beliefs, relationships and habits, even if doing so leaves me naked and vulnerable and scared.
• I will ask for help, even if doing so makes me feel or look weak or silly.
• I will dig find out more about who I am, even if I don’t like what I find at first I will embrace my true self, even if it’s hard.
• I will speak up and stand up for causes and beliefs that are important to me, even if I offend.
• I will pursue my dreams with passion and daring, even if I have to sacrifice personal safety and comfort.
• I will take risks in business and in life, even if I’m unsure and don’t have all the information.

 

Please join me this year and work on loving who you already are.
Namaste
Danielle

 

 

Gratitude and a Change in Attitude.

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Balfon Yoga- Increase self esteem

It’s American Thanksgiving  and that got me thinking about  gratitude, I came to the realization that it is very easy for me to be grateful for all of the wonderful things in my life that have been going great … But what about those things that are not going so good? How can we expand our gratitude to those wonderful lessons that can teach us so much?

This past weekend I found myself getting angrier and angrier at an individual who had dropped a proverbial hot potato into my lap.  Now this person and I have quite a history of one being on the end of helping and one receiving, in the vast majority of cases I have felt that I am the one coming to the  rescue and I admit after doing so for many years I have grown a rather big chip on my shoulder.  As I was busy dealing with the consequences of some one else’s actions and feeling resentful,..   Fate decided to teach me a lesson…

I had the  Tom Waits song “Come on up to the  House” playing in the car as I drove and the line…“Get down off the cross we could use the wood.”  interrupted my venting session…

I just had to laugh as I realized that perhaps I needed an attitude adjustment.  I had climbed up onto my self created cross and was quite content in seeing myself as a victim.. It was time to look at the situation differently… This person is going  to act the way they always have… And I will most likely initially feel dumped on.

However if I am fortunate I will have many years of these type of situations for if the world is good we will continue on this path  thankful knowing how each one of us is going to act during difficult times. Grateful that this relationship is constant and never changing…

I’d love to hear from you … Have you had a moment or a  situation that made it difficult for you to have gratitude for them?  Or not… What about those?

 

Fall teaches a lesson in Change

Balfon Yoga- Increase self esteem

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When your roots are most firm, your branches steady in the winds, when you are the most prepared that’s when everything changes.

Believe me, it’s true.

As I watch the leaf pile raked up yesterday blow back across the lawn this morning it is again apparent no matter how much you prepare something unanticipated will happen.

You wake up, you know, the ritual, the players, the script, what the backdrop is, it is the same every single day. Partner,  kids, moods, songs, food. If it does not go as planned you may get grumpy, (someone used the last of the milk) it sets the tone for your day, or does it???

It can be changed in an instant, a word or gesture, a call. The world has changed, you have changed, life is different and so are you, we may be resistant to change but it is a constant, which can be counted upon.
It’s good to have a constant even if it is change.

I guess this time I will put the hockey net over my leaf pile…That will hold them until the Kids play Ball Hockey.

 

Have you noticed any big changes this  Fall Season ????

 

Let us help you embrace change in your life!  Call today for a consultation.

What is Yoga Life Coaching?

 

 Balafon Yoga Life Coaching works as personal advocate to help you decide what it is you want to achieve in your life.  

It starts as a purposeful, powerful conversation  where I will listen to you tell me all about you and what your dreams, hopes, and desires really are.  Together we will get a clear perception of what that means for you and by the end of the conversation we will have developed action steps to get you where you want to be in your life.

 Danielle Ingram is a licensed yoga teacher at her practice, Balafon Yoga, in Burlington Ontario.  

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